Mr. And Mrs.

Ah, the wedding trip. Where to start? At the beginning, with the flight ‘o farts, or at the end with the non-alarming alarm?

How about we just discuss the flight there? I flew out on Wednesday (and May-b I’m going to have to make you some incredible mushroom meal to make up for the cold and early drive - Thank you for doing that!), from Regina to Calgary, then Calgary to Victoria. I arrived in Victoria just as they were canceling all sorts of flights. We were the last ones in that day – but we didn’t go into Victoria as planned, we stayed in Sidney. The storm was just that bad. Even here they might have closed some highways, I think. There? Total panic bordering on mass hysteria. They were canceling flights in and out of Vancouver, too, so it wasn’t just the island being snowed in.

On a side note, given that the last giant snow storm they had was ten years ago, which is coincidentally the last time I was there in December, don’t you think the city of Victoria should pay for me to go to Hawaii in December 2016? It would be cheaper than the cost of another winter like this one!

The flight from Calgary to Victoria was bumpy, but it was better than the flight to Calgary. See, the thing is, the guy one row ahead and one seat over from me was…under the weather. Or maybe he just eats a lot of beans. Whichever it was, the entire flight was punctuated by AUDIBLE (which would be ok if they weren’t also SCENTABLE*) explosions of gas. Eventually, people started making sounds of disgust – or despair – every time he let one rip. The guy he was with finally whispered (he was directly ahead of me, so I heard him) “Dude, ya gotta stop”. To which the poor man replied “If I had any control over this, do you think I’d be doing it in the first place?” Poor guy. By the end of the flight, he was despised by all, and he knew it. On the plus side, I didn’t have a lot of time to spare in Calgary to make my connecting flight to Vcitoria, and I’ve NEVER seen a plane empty so quickly!

*Not sure if that is an actual word. But it should be.