Your dog's crazier than mine. Possibly.

I am, for the most part, used to my own neighbours thinking I’m crazy, but now…now I have to face the possibility that MayB’s neighbours think the same thing.

A. and I looked after her dog and her house this weekend. I myself went the extra mile and looked after her cold as well. Because snot-filled, cranky and crazy is a good way to spend a long weekend. It is, right? I mean I’d hate to think I’ wasted a whole weekend.

The only real nutbar in this story, though, is Mayb’s dog. If, when I get there, someone is home – even if it isn’t L. or MayB - she barks like crazy. If the house is empty, she is nowhere near as miffed. Sort of a “well, I guess if you’re the only one willing to be here with me I won’t bark my fool head completely off”. When someone is there, say my son, house sitting, she goes NUTS. I went on Sunday morning to take A. back to his dad’s, and the dog barked for a half a minute at nine thousand decibels, glared at me, threatened me with imminent death and then – coward that she is – went and jumped on A in bed, to let him carry out all the threats she’d made (As it happens, he wasn’t so happy at being woken up, but he neither barked nor threatened).

And walks? You know how most dogs go crazy at even the hint of a walk? Well, the best I could manage was a Walk ‘n Carry. She wouldn’t go for a walk from the house, but if I carried her (hence the sideways looks from the neighbours) to the park, she’d play around and then happily walk back. So that’s what we did – I’d carry, she’d walk.

Eating: yes, MayB’s dog has issues there, too. She’s female – human or canine, we all have eating issues. Anyway… she picks up one – ONE – piece of food from her bowl, carries it into the living room, drops it on the floor, looks at it, stares coolly at me (“think you’re going to get my piece of kibble? Never!”) then eats it. Then she goes back to her bowl and does it all over again. Can you imagine if we did this?

Hey, where’s crazy uncle Larry?
In the family room, eating a carrot slice. Aunt Maude is in the bedroom with a spoonful of soup. I think crazy grandma may be out back with a raisin.